Chapter 1: Embracing the Journey

In life, the key to obtaining everything you desire lies in your willingness to fulfill the needs of others. This sentiment is echoed by Zig Ziglar: “You can have everything in life that you want if you just give enough other people what they want.”

Two weeks ago, my husband took me to the hospital, where he lovingly assured me, “Don’t worry, everything will be fine,” as he kissed me goodbye. Typically, I am a person who feels grounded and comfortable in my surroundings, but as the hour of my surgery approached, anxiety began to set in. The idea of undergoing such a significant procedure was indeed intimidating.

I reminded myself that countless women had endured similar surgeries and emerged healthier and happier. As I changed into the hospital gown, I took a deep breath, calmed my nerves, and surrendered to the process ahead.

Witnessing the Environment

I made a conscious choice to shift my focus away from my fears and instead observed the world around me. I noticed the male nurse who wheeled me down the corridor, his attention fixed ahead; the compassionate smiles from passersby; and the reassuring words from a nurse who promised I would feel much better afterward.

Engaging with my surroundings transformed my experience. By the time I entered the operating room, all my fears had dissipated. The bright, bustling environment was filled with medical professionals in white coats. The surgeon greeted me warmly, reiterating the procedure details. Instead of feeling tense, I felt a sense of calm. The last thing I remember was Dr. Robinson saying, “Meredith, you’ll now feel a slight sensation in your arm…”

A moment later—actually, three hours later—I woke up, and it was all behind me.

The Most Important Insight

The lead-up to my surgery began a month prior when I experienced severe back pain that escalated into an unbearable ache. The doctor’s diagnosis was shocking, and learning that I needed surgery prompted me to reassess my daily habits. It wasn’t so much about what I was doing wrong, but rather what I wasn’t doing to enhance my well-being. Thus, I chose to dedicate this chapter of my life to personal growth and development.

Thus far, my journey has been rich with lessons, but the most profound has been this: to give without expecting anything in return. This realization struck me when I found myself subtly (yet significantly) disappointed by the absence of expected visitors during my hospital stay. “After all I’ve done for them,” I thought.

Initially, I felt let down. However, I managed to pivot my perspective by redirecting my focus from their actions to my own thoughts and behaviors. I reflected on my sentiment: “After all I’ve done for them!” Yes, I had given a lot, yet the issue lay in the expectation I had attached to my generosity. That little word “I” carried a heavy weight of expectation.

Recognizing Expectations

Even the smallest expectations can create ripples of disappointment. Many of us overlook these subtleties, yet they can impact our emotional health. It’s crucial to be mindful of the expectations we hold for ourselves, others, and the world around us, striving to keep them manageable and within our control.

Focusing on Generosity

Next, I pondered Zig Ziglar’s assertion: “You can have everything in life that you want if you just give enough other people what they want.” What a powerful thought! Could it truly be that simple? The answer is yes, but there’s a caveat we must not ignore.

If we concentrate solely on the notion of obtaining everything we desire, we risk falling into the trap of “giving” while simultaneously expecting something in return. If our intention is to gain from our generosity, can we genuinely call it giving? In reality, it becomes a transaction rather than an act of kindness.

True generosity occurs when we offer without any expectation of reciprocation. This is where we find the crucial distinction. By focusing on the desires of others, we practice selflessness. When we genuinely act without ulterior motives, we ultimately receive everything we seek. This selflessness is the genuine secret to happiness.

Copyright © 2022 Meredith Forder. All rights reserved.

Thank you for taking the time to read this article; your engagement is valued.

To explore more, visit The Happy Intellect.

If you enjoyed this story, you might also like:

Success without Stress