Chapter 1: What Is Success?

So, what does success truly mean?

According to the definition provided by Google, success is described as the "achievement of an aim or purpose." Is this something we can genuinely attain? The answer is a resounding yes! Take my grandfather, for instance—his goal each summer is to cultivate his garden, grow vegetables, and harvest fruit from his trees. By achieving this every year, he finds success.

However, when I refer to success, I’m not speaking of this simple definition; I'm addressing something much deeper. Many individuals believe that achieving success will dramatically alter their life experiences. They imagine that upon reaching their goals, their world will become brighter, their music will sound sweeter, and they will radiate a constant glow of happiness. This notion is quite misleading.

Countless successful individuals exist, and I can assure you that many faced disappointment upon reaching their goals. Those who didn’t often entered the realm of success without any high expectations in the first place. Consider someone like Mark Zuckerberg; he seems less like someone pursuing success and more like a person who channeled his energy into creating a remarkable platform after a tough breakup. For years, building Facebook was his primary focus. But after achieving millionaire status, do you think he was elated? It’s hard to believe that he was.

Zuckerberg didn’t expect any transformation in his life after attaining success, which is why he didn’t experience dissatisfaction. Unfortunately, that’s not the case for most people.

The typical narrative unfolds as follows: An ambitious individual sets a lofty goal, dedicates themselves tirelessly to reaching it, often at the expense of their well-being. Each passing day, they eagerly anticipate the moment of success. After years of hard work, they finally achieve their goal. Yet, to their dismay, they feel an overwhelming emptiness. The anticipated joy is absent; life feels unchanged. The world isn’t more vivid, music still sounds the same, and their persistent problems linger.

For many, this realization can lead to feelings of depression. This has been witnessed time and again. For example, Michael Phelps grappled with depression after winning six gold medals at the 2004 Olympics, and Kurt Cobain struggled with it even after achieving rockstar status. This phenomenon is widespread, hinting at a fundamental truth about human nature: we are designed to perpetually yearn for more.

This craving stems from an internal struggle. Those who are troubled inside often look to external achievements to remedy their feelings. Yet, this cycle continues, as external accomplishments provide only temporary relief, ultimately leading to self-destruction and a return to square one. It’s clear that this approach isn't effective in the long run. If a strategy fails, why continue using it?

Instead, we should prioritize internal healing. It’s illogical to believe that external validation—whether it's wealth or admiration—can fill an internal void. To feel content, we need to work on ourselves rather than waiting for the world to change us.

This is the crux of why many fail to find true success. While success is a valid concept in terms of achieving goals, the experience of success is largely imaginary. Once you reach a goal, the fundamental aspects of your life remain unchanged. Real transformation occurs only when we change ourselves.

Consider this: if you won the lottery tomorrow but still believed you were poor, that money would vanish in no time. Conversely, if someone who identifies as wealthy won the lottery, they would simply increase their net worth. Everything boils down to our self-perception. If life was fulfilling before achieving a goal, it will remain fulfilling afterward. But if life was unsatisfactory prior, it will continue to be so, regardless of any new possessions or experiences.

Take Elvis Presley, for instance. When he became wealthy, it appeared he was living a dream—luxurious cars, a beautiful wife, and fame. Yet, beneath that facade, he battled addiction to prescription drugs and passed away at just 42. If external success were the ultimate solution, he would still be alive today, right? The same applies to Kurt Cobain.

The experience of success is an illusion. Our life experiences will not change unless we do.

I wholeheartedly encourage you to pursue success in your endeavors, but don’t expect it to transform who you are. The main issue lies in our unrealistic expectations of success. By relinquishing these expectations, we free ourselves from inevitable disappointment.

Moreover, humans are inherently wired for more. No matter how much we achieve, we will always desire more. Satisfaction is elusive. As soon as we accomplish one goal, we move on to the next. This isn’t limited to those who pursue success; consider video games. What happens when you complete a game? Do you continue to play it, or do you lose interest and seek a new challenge? If you've ever finished a game, you know the answer.

After conquering something like Dark Souls, the journey ends. Every adversary has been defeated, every challenge met. You either seek a new game or start over. This is precisely what happens in life.

So, if you choose to chase success, be prepared: it will be a lifelong pursuit.

Thank you for your time,

Godfrey

This video explores how the concepts of failure and success are often mere illusions, encouraging viewers to redefine their goals and mindset.

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